Tuesday, 21 April 2015

I moved out of my flat.

It was back in february, but I forgot to write about it.
Sadly, I had to leave my beautiful and sunny apartment. 

Goodbye pretty but impractical bathtub!
In spite of all it's humidity, coldness and mice infestation, I loved that house. It was big, had a lot of sunlight and incredibly cheap rent.

But I didn't love my flatmates, so I left.

I think, specially as I get older, good flatmates are harder to find. I'm now pretty sure the main reason people get married is so they don't have to go through the troubles of co-renting a space with a stranger.
Flatmates may even be nice and like that same things you do, but that doesn't mean you will necessarily have a good house-sharing relationship with them.

So I decided to write a questionary for the future event of having to choose a flatmate! Feel free to use it and report to me on the results:

Flatmate Inquiry:

It's 2 am and you really want to eat popcorn. How to solve this urge?
1. Maybe I will still be on time for a night session in the cinema and grab a bucket
2. I'll make them in a pan, in the kitchen

Read carefully and choose the appropriate phrase:
1."There's only one toilet paper roll in the bathroom"
2. "There's still one toilet paper roll in the bathroom"

The idea of other people having to touch the body hair you leave in the bathtub...
1.…repulses you.
2…never comes to your mind.

When is it the best time to take down a christmas tree?
2. May

"The number of people I'm allowed to invite to spend the night is proportional to the size of my bedroom"
2. False

The living room is…
1. free space to assemble my studio
2. everyone's


This inquiry has no wrong answers. You are both supposed to take the test and it's a matter of your choices combining with the other person's.
 Anyway, I won't need it so soon because right now I'm living with a friend, Mariana.

plus her cat and boyfriend.

The house is full of Mariana's stuff. And her stuff is very cool, and I'm currently developing a hobby of photographing myself posing with her things.

lady statue
super 8 camera
elf ears
I really spend a lot of time home alone and have to entertain myself somehow. Don't judge me.

In the meanwhile, my parents bought an apartment.
They meant to invest in real-estate for a while, but now that I was sort looking for a new place, they also started checking agencies websites and found out about an auction of houses seized by a bank. My dad went there and bought us a very cheap and tiny apartment in town.
It still needs some serious repair, (the windows are broken and there's no kitchen) but we've been checking IKEA catalogues, and making crazy plans! Now I'll have a house all for myself, and it's not a temporary thing, I can fill it with stuff I've always needed/wanted but had no space for:
Like an indoors slackline

and an inflatable pool


and a full body mirror

no more checking myself out in shop windows, when it's already too late to change what I'm wearing.

and a Totoro-shaped bed.

You would expect that when they decided to buy the house I was very happy.
After all, this means no more dealing with flatmates or landlords, and no more paying rent.

But I wasn't happy at first. Not at all.

You see, dear reader, my brain is very self-centered and dramatic. It's like having a mexican soap opera cirurgically implanted in my head.


I'm capable of finding problems even in the good stuff, and spent the first day hyperventilating and thinking  "This is it. Now I'm never going to leave this city. Having a house of my own, I'm going to be stuck in here forever"

This was a silly thing to worry about. But I can see why I freaked out:  

I like living in Porto, but sometimes I'm afraid that I'm getting too comfortable here. I'm afraid of getting too comfortable with being unemployed and living off my parents. And I'm mostly afraid that I might be giving up, or not doing enough.

I studied design but don't have a single actual design work in my portfolio. I don't think I know enough to work in a big studio, even in the very very slim chance they would want me. I'm constantly getting emails from people interested in hiring me for illustration work or comics that end up not writing back. And I never know what made them change their mind.
I keep myself busy doing my own projects and I think a lot of people see what I'm doing from the outside and feel like it's somewhat successful. But I'm not so sure it is.

I really miss some sort of structure, schedules and people to work with and learn from. I'm not sure if this is just a wobbly and temporary stage, and things will feel more on track eventually and I just have to hang on, and be patient and persistent. Or if I should make a change. 

In that case, I'll have to seriously start considering moving somewhere else. Outside Porto.

And then I'll have to look for flatmates again.

Thank god I made that list.

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